Don’t Say This: an on-going series

Dear Fertile People,

I’m sure you mean well.
I’m sure you have no idea how much pain and anger a few little words can cause. They sting though. A lot.

You just need to relax.
My nephew has a friend whose sister in-law decided to stop trying and she got pregnant right away.
You should take a vacation. I bet you’ll come back pregnant!

Please don’t say this.
A relaxing vacation will not unblock tubes, normalize hormone levels or magically evaporate the cysts covering my ovaries. My infertility is not a result of stress, I promise you. It is a result of a clusterfuck of medical conditions that actually exist.

So please, don’t say this. Instead, you could just say, I’m sorry this is so hard. That’s it.

(Photographic evidence that stress is not the cause of my infertility. Those glaring cysts are).


Dear Fertile People,
Being infertile in a fertile world hurts. A lot.
I get that most people don’t (and can’t) understand this pain.
I am going to attempt to explain it.